Three days had passed and she wouldn’t return any of Jaden’s calls or when he came over, she refused to answer the door. She had even went to the extent of putting her car in the garage so he would think she wasn’t home. She knew that he should’ve been the person she should turn to in this time of need, but she couldn’t look him in the face and tell him that she might have AIDS. There just was no way she could made up a fictitious story to stay out of work for the rest of the week. So she had at least three days to get it together at work. Jaden left message after message that it got to the point when she checked her voicemail, it told her the mailbox was full and she needed to discard some messages. She knew she had to tell him, but how? It was so unfair to him, but if she told him, what if he left her and she would be all alone? She had spoken to Jordan and she kept telling her that she needed to call Jaden, but she couldn’t. Taylor knew he was worried sick about her because he had called Jordan the other night looking for Taylor. Deep down, she knew what the right thing to do was, but in the same breath, she couldn’t get enough strength to pick up the phone. She tried watching television, but it seemed like everything had to do with having HIV or some other sexually transmitted diseases, and it went for the same thing when she looked through some of her magazines that had come in. She didn’t want to get drunk because then she really wouldn’t been any good and on top of that, it would only complicate matters worse when she did become sober. She thought long and hard but was never really sure of what she should do. Telling Jaden was one thing and if he did decide he was going to stay, how would he feel after she drops the second bombshell that she could possibly not be able to have any kids? That was a double whammy that he didn’t deserve, but, in the same breath, she knew deep down in her heart that telling him was the right thing to do. So, finally, she stopped acting stubborn and picked up the phone and dialed his number. The phone didn’t ring a complete ring before he answered it all hysterical because of her.
“Hi, Jaden.”
“Where the hell have you been?”
“I’ve been home.”
“Don’t lie. I’ve been by your place every day and your car is gone.”
“I know, because I put it in the garage.”
“Tell me, Taylor, what I did to you so bad that you would have to shut me out like this?”
“Honey, I am soooo sorry, but I’ve just been going through some things that I needed time to sort out by myself.”
“What could it be, Taylor? … I mean, I thought you and I were in a relationship … I love you, for crying out loud!”
“Whoa … wait a minute … you love me? … You never said that before.”
“Of course, I love you. I think I always have since I met you.”
“Jaden, cut it out. I’m serious.”
“I am, too, Taylor. It was something about you that made my heart just skip a beat ... and as cheesy as it may sound, it’s the truth.”
“Ok, well, what I’m about to say might change how you feel about me.”
“I doubt that, but, please, go ahead. I’m listening.”
“Are you sure you want me to tell you over the phone and not face to face?”
“I’m sure … Please, tell me already.”
“Well, I got a phone call from an ex-boyfriend and I got some disturbing news.”
“Ok, go … I’m listening.”
“Well, he’s HIV positive and has been for like two-and-a-half years.”
“What the hell that got to do with you or me?”
“Well, I slept with him two years ago with a rubber ... Hello? ... Hello? ... Jaden, are you there?”
“Yes, I just can’t believe this ... So is he sure?”
“Sure that he has HIV? ... Yes, and I’m sure I slept with him two years ago.”
“Do you love him?”
“What?”
“You heard me, Taylor. Just answer the damn question.”
“No, I don’t love him or want to be with him.”
“Is it because of his current condition that you don’t want to be with him?”
“No ... Jaden, listen to me. I’m dating you and only you, and I’m just as much in love with you than you are with me. That’s why it was so hard to tell you.”
“But you just blew me off like I wasn’t nothing, like you didn’t care about my feelings … How could you be so mean?”
“Babe, that was never my intention.”
“It might not have been, but I am hurt by this.”
“Please, Jaden, don’t shut me out … I need you.”
“How would you feel if I did the same thing to you?”
“I would be angry as hell!”
“My point exactly ... and for you to think after a few days, you can call me up like now is the time. That’s really fucked up, Taylor.”
“Jaden, you don’t have to curse at me.”
“Yeah, Taylor, maybe I do because maybe that is the only way for you to actually pay attention and listen to my feelings … What you did was fucked up and I would never do that.”
“But ... Jaden ...”
“There is no ‘but Jaden’ nothing. You kicked me to the curb like I wasn’t shit like I didn’t mean anything to you, and that hurts, Taylor … real bad!”
“Jaden, which was not my intention … I love you with all of my heart and I am soooo sorry.”
“Taylor, you don’t get it. You turned your emotions on and off like a faucet.”
“How do you figure that? … I didn’t do that.”
“Yes, you did. For the past three days, I haven’t heard from you, just like someone who doesn’t have feelings for a person. Then, today, I guess because you turned your feelings back on, I should now jump up for joy? Well, I’m not.”
“I never meant for it to happen like this,” Taylor said, crying.
“What did you expect? That I was so pussy whipped that when you finally decided to call, I would be there like some lovesick puppy?”
“No … I admit I was wrong for not keeping an open line of communication. But this was very hard on me. The results of this test will affect the rest of my life.”
“I understand all of that, but if we’re a couple, we would’ve tackled this problem together ... not separate, like you did.”
“No … that’s exactly why I’m calling because you should be here with me going through this with me … Freedom even asked me if I wanted him to go with me to get the test, but I told him I’d be going with you, Jaden … and only you,” Jordan said, whining like a child.
“You just have a real funny way of showing it, Taylor.”
“Look, can we drop it for now because I got more news to tell you?”
“Wow … Taylor, you have really given me an earful. I don’t know if I can take anymore.”
“Please, Jaden?”
“I’m listening.”
“Well, let me start off by asking you this …”
“What?”
“Do you want to have kids?”
“Well, yeah, in the future. Not right now … wait a minute, are you pregnant?”
“Oh, no, Jaden. Nothing like that.”
“Well, what is it?”
“Well, back in the day, I was a little loose and had a few abortions. Now I don’t know if I can have kids or not.”
“Have you seen a fertility specialist?”
“No.”
“Well, how do you know?”
“I just figured since you and I had that time when you didn’t have a rubber and we had sex, and I didn’t get pregnant.”
“Well, we were just lucky … doesn’t mean you’re not able to have kids.”
“Jaden, you haven’t even addressed the fact that you may have HIV, too, since we slept together without a rubber.”
“Yes, Taylor, I’ve thought about it, but whatever happens is going to happen. But I’m not going to run from it or not talk to you for three days.”
“Jaden, I thought we dropped that.”
“You brought it back up again. Look, Taylor, you hurt me and as much as I would like to act like nothing is wrong, I can’t.”
“I’m not asking you to, but, please, know that I love you and need you to be in my corner right now more than anything.”
“Ok, Taylor. I’m not leaving you.”
“You’re not?”......
Chapter 1
Come closer...ok, now that I have your attention let me introduce myself. My name is Simone Hunter. I am a 32-year-old single female, and I definitely have it going on—at least I think so. I stand at 5’10, weigh about 140 pounds, and everything is definitely proportioned correctly. I have a caramel complexion with brown eyes. My chestnut shoulder-length hair has just the right amount of highlights, thanks to my hairstylist, Mecca.
I considered myself a complete package, and without a doubt, I knew I could turn plenty of heads whenever I entered a room. Like that Klymaxx song from back in the day “The Men All Pause,” the men did just that.
I am the owner of Millennium Realty, an elite real estate company located in Central Jersey—a company that I founded five years ago. In just a short time, Millennium Realty has turned into a lucrative business. As a result, I was able to purchase a spacious five-bedroom home located in Wayside, New Jersey. This is an exclusive community that consisted of the upper class. The least expensive homes ranged from $600,000 and up.
I have expensive taste, so it wouldn’t be a surprise that I drive a 2009 midnight black E55 Mercedes-Benz. From my hard work and determination, you could say I had a pretty decent life. But there were those demons I couldn’t escape, no matter how hard I tried or how much Patron I drank. During those “dark moments,” I would find myself in a state of denial at times. I loved my life but couldn’t believe that I truly deserved any of the popularity and accolades associated with this lifestyle.
I had made up my mind a long time ago that life was about choices; I wasn’t going to make the wrong ones or live a life full of regrets, based on fear of change. Life is too short and I planned on living mine to the fullest, regardless of the past set of cards that were dealt to me.
Growing up, I didn’t have a great relationship with my mother, Daphne—yes, we’re on a first name basis—because she preferred to cater to dirty, old men while staying heavily intoxicated to the point that she was incoherent. This lifestyle was more appealing than being a mother to my brother, Kareem, and me.
My relationship with Kareem was not that great either. The majority of the time, he would usually be high, thinking about getting high, or simply begging for money. You know it’s bad when you are paying your family members not to come around—sad but true.
My father, Keith Roland, whom I had never met, overdosed on heroin when I was just 3 years old. And for that reason, I wasn’t given the opportunity to get to know him, so I stopped yearning for that man a long time ago.
My two closest friends, Jordan and Taylor, were the only resemblance of a family to me. Jordan was like my little protégée; she was a few years younger than me, and she absolutely adored me. She was a very smart lady with her head on straight. In her adolescent years, her intelligence once might have been questioned since she was a bit untamable; “dropping it like it was hot” for anyone who would pay to watch. Now she holds a secure job. Since she doesn’t have any real family, I took on the role of mentor/sister/confidant.
My other girl, Taylor, was my true “around the way” girl, totally down for anything. She was two years younger than me and always had some thug hugged up on her. The people on the block knew not to fuck with Taylor because she could hold her own. Plus, it was no secret that she had two of the toughest and grimiest brothers you could ever meet: Culture and True, who spent most of their time in the streets. These were the guys who made you shit your pants because you were just that spooked, but also made you eat it … literally. Everyone, young and old, knew not to mess with them.
My girls were sort of opposites, yet together, we all blended quite well. I was definitely blessed to have not one, but two. Friendship was a great gift that I tried not to take for granted, but when I did, my girls were always there to keep a sister in check!
My family life wasn’t the greatest, and as a result, I often had a protective shield that kept people from getting close to me. Little did anyone know, I had other plans in store for myself that not even my junkie brother, drunk-most-of-the-time mother or some wanna-be thug was going to stop me from executing … BELIEVE THAT!!!
AEIID-Kisha Green © 2009